Don’t ever think that the reason I am peaceful is because I have forgotten how to be violent.

Don’t ever think that the reason I am peaceful is because I have forgotten how to be violent.

Is it a direct conflict for a person of peace to understand violence for the purpose of protecting themselves and others from harm?

At first blush, one might make such a presumption.

And they would be incorrect in doing so.

A person of peace has usually arrived at this state of mind because they have had their encounters with violence and mayhem. While this is not always the case, I have discovered in speaking with many people, that their path to a completely peaceful existence was forged through moments of violence that have shaped them in unforeseen ways.

Taking the word “violence” and expanding it far beyond the physical violence category, perhaps your journey has encountered unscrupulous collaborators, clients or instructors along the way. Perhaps in your encounters with them, you found yourself victimized from their choices, leaving you in an equilibrium that was less than what you had started with.

Is it possible to take lessons learned from moments like that and develop better defensive techniques, all the while remaining a person who prefers no conflict and will work with extra measure to resolve anything peacefully rather than engage with confrontation?

I believe that it is, and have worked over the course of my life to approach each of my conflicting relationships with diplomacy and decorum until such time as the opposing party opts out of such parameters. Under those circumstances, I just get silent and walk away. All of that remains a constant to the thought process I am explaining. But… if they continue to deliver an onslaught of negativity and other behaviors that jeopardize my life or the lives of those around me, only then would the more aggressive side awaken to deal with the circumstances and nullify them back to a position of no importance whatsoever.

After having been a victim of violent crime, I can share that I believe that everyone should be taught how to defend themselves. Being a victim is horrific and not having any skills to fall back on at a moment like that, exacerbates the problem even further.

Any violent or aggressive act should only holds merit as the very last act of refuge. If you respond to aggression with violence, you must be fully prepared, and do not approach that with half of your skills, or you could be killed in the process. In black belt training we are taught that there is no reason to prolong a fight. Instead, we are shown how to use techniques that are simple, correct, direct and appropriate to end the fight as quickly as we are able. With that training, a fight should be fast and decisive, leaving no room for error.

Violence is almost never the proper option. There is, in most circumstances, a way to work things out peacefully. Aim for that option for as long as the situation will facilitate. But do not ever lie down and become a victim.

Happy Monday!

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