Man cannot remake himself without suffering for he is both the marble and the sculptor.

Wouldn’t it be so much easier if we could decide we want to change, and as easily as hitting Command Z on our keyboards, all that we did not like was instantly undone?

If change were not so cathartic, would it in fact, be change at all?

Imagine for a moment a world in which you and everyone else had the ability to change everything and anything any time and at any moment.

You look in the mirror one day and decide you want to change everything. Looks, height, hair, facial features, nationality, pigmentation, sexual orientation or any other tiny or massive detail of your choosing.

You want to know things, you want to forget things, you want to try things, see things, experience things. 

You want possessions, and change where you live, and change what your job is.

Every last detail about your reality is up for grabs. All the time. Every last day.

And then what?

Do we become experience junkies and live a life of constant fantasies, wishes and dreams realized?

How long will that remain fulfilling?

Every day you wake up and you can be, do, see, and experience any and every last thing you want.

Would you be happier?

Would that happiness be sustainable? And if so, for how long?

When does it finally peak and start to turn into an episode of The Twilight Zone? When does Rod Serling walk around the corner and describe your blissful existence that ultimately becomes the greatest prison of them all?

Or is it truly paradise?

If every last human being on Earth were capable of shape shifting their reality to suit their purposes all the time, would we ultimately be a happier, more content specie? To envision such a dynamic, we are all masters of the universe in our own dream world. In that world, all that I share above is possible. So if you were continually living a dream in which everyone was saying, doing, acting, attracting, engaging and playing as you desire, then you have full control of reality.

Or is it perhaps a false promise of happiness because part of what truly makes life in this 3 Dimensional playground called Earth compelling, is playing the hand we are dealt? I would argue that it is the circumstances in which we are operating that govern our potential for satisfaction in life. Even when many of them are not going in our favor. It is the knowledge that we do have the skills, power, ability, desire, and motivation to make things improve that creates the deepest satisfaction in life, even if at face value it appears far less fantastical than living a life in which our ID is continuously served all of its hedonistic desires. 

Sculpting ourselves is a delicate art form. We go too far and it hurts. We do too little and we continue to suffer. Sometimes the harder and more deliberately that we sculpt, the more pain we put ourselves through. 

But in the end, we reap the benefits of what we have sewn. And isn’t that truly the meaning of life?

Happy Sunday!

The way you love is magic in its purest form.

LORELAI

What is love? How does it happen? Why does it happen? What is the internal mechanism that changes when we love something? Is it purely emotional? Chemical? Neural? What physical proof do we have that love even exists?

Do you want to witness a magic trick?  Fall in love with something or someone.

One of your favorite artists releases a new track, and from the moment you hear it, you know you absolutely love it. Why?

Your baby is born, and all through the womb, you are falling in love with it, but something incredibly potent happens as the baby takes its first breath and cries. What exactly has happened in that transformative moment in time?

You are walking through an art gallery, and turn the corner, and suddenly, there it is. The one piece of art that absolutely takes your breath away. One second earlier, you did not know it exists, and in the next second, you know you cannot live without it.

Is that not magic?

We romanticize love taking place in the heart, but in actuality, it is all in the brain…

A few notes from Harvard on the topic of what is love: Love can be distilled into three categories: lust, attraction, and attachment. Though there are overlaps and subtleties to each, each type is characterized by its own set of hormones. Testosterone and estrogen drive lust; dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin create attraction; and oxytocin and vasopressin mediate attachment. Lust is driven by the desire for sexual gratification. The evolutionary basis for this stems from our need to reproduce, a need shared among all living things. Through reproduction, organisms pass on their genes, and thus contribute to the perpetuation of their species. Meanwhile, attraction seems to be a distinct, though closely related, phenomenon. While we can certainly lust for someone we are attracted to, and vice versa, one can happen without the other. Attraction involves the brain pathways that control “reward” behavior, which partly explains why the first few weeks or months of a relationship can be so exhilarating and even all-consuming.

Dopamine, produced by the hypothalamus, is a particularly well-publicized player in the brain’s reward pathway – it’s released when we do things that feel good to us. In this case, these things include spending time with loved ones and having sex. High levels of dopamine and a related hormone, norepinephrine, are released during attraction. These chemicals make us giddy, energetic, and euphoric, even leading to decreased appetite and insomnia – which means you actually can be so “in love” that you can’t eat and can’t sleep.

Last but not least, attachment is the predominant factor in long-term relationships. While lust and attraction are pretty much exclusive to romantic entanglements, attachment mediates friendships, parent-infant bonding, social cordiality, and many other intimacies as well. The two primary hormones here appear to be oxytocin and vasopressin.

Katherine Wu, the student at Harvard whose material I have shared, writes more extensively on the topic. You can read it here. https://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2017/love-actually-science-behind-lust-attraction-companionship/#:~:text=High%20levels%20of%20dopamine%20and,eat%20and%20can’t%20sleep.

Wishing you a loving Saturday!

We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.

ALBERT EINSTEIN

Think different. 

That was Apple’s mantra. (Even if they did not use proper English as it should be Think differently.)

The world is changing so incredibly quickly at this moment, we are continuously on the watch for new options, opportunities, and challenges. During this time, we are battling a wave of new obstacles and counter forces, each appearing capable of eliminating our dreams, hopes and desires. 

The more we work to evolve, the faster the circumstances around us evolve, making a continuously unstable playing field on which we must make our plans, evolve our approach and perpetually explore every option at our fingertips. 

Under circumstances of this nature, it would almost appear impossible for us to find a proper course on which we may navigate our path to a new safe harbor. Even as we have chosen that course, circumstances may evolve and the path we have set out upon will require new perspectives, approaches and means to accomplish whatever we put forth at the outset.

Yet, despite all of that cacophony in which we operate, we manage to prevail, time and time again. How is this possible? 

Presumably it is due to a continuous set of sensory apparati in our beings that tune into the harmonic distortions that impede us and give us internal warnings that things are changing and that we are going to have to take a new approach if we are to succeed in our respective mission.

The Illusion Factory has earned our place in the future by helping to invent it. Our approach has always been to look at how things are produced currently and project how they will evolve and then invent the pathways, approaches, methodologies and experiences required to help our clients in their pursuit of the future opportunities that await them.

It is no wonder that Apple adopted their mantra, as the continuous wave of revolutionary experiences that they have created has evolved humanity in countless ways. Try and imagine what it was like before you had any computer whatsoever in your access, let alone one in your home! How many phone numbers did you have memorized before you had your first smart device? We, as a specie, have evolved into a cyborg (part human and part machine) as a result of the invention of the iPhone and following that, the Android devices. The smart device is clearly an external hard drive to accommodate the human brain and which augments that brain in countless ways. 

Life will continue to put new problems in our path, and therefore make it incumbent upon us to work daily to find our path between where we are currently and where we are headed. As best as I have been able to calculate, that path is a nonstop maze of solving new problems, and evolving into new beings along the way. 

It may not be easy, but if we embrace it as a fact of life, it is not only fun and challenging, but perhaps it is one of the greatest adventures of all time.

Happy Tuesday!

The problem in our country isn’t with books being banned, but with people no longer reading. You don’t have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them.

RAY BRADBURY

Cultures of control abhor the prospect of free thought. The necessity to dominate the mindset of a population is the very top priority of a society whose dictatorial, authoritarian regime must ascribe.

In writing Fahrenheit 451, in 1953, Ray Bradbury created a dystopian vision of a future America in which all books are burned by “firemen.” While potentially shocking to some, it was really just a recap of older chapters in history such as the Bonfire of the Vanities in Florence, in which supporters of the Dominican friar Girolamo Savonarola collected and burned thousands of objects such as cosmetics, art, and books in the public square of Florence, Italy. The focus of this destruction was on objects that might tempt one to sin, including vanity items such as mirrors, cosmetics, fine dresses, playing cards, and musical instruments. Other targets included books which Savonarola deemed immoral, manuscripts of secular songs, and artworks, including paintings and sculpture.

In all cases, fictional or real, the need to extinguish free thought remains the topic of concern. If a dominant society is imposing their will upon the people, rather than enabling a true democracy in which the people are able to create a safe haven to disagree publicly and debate the alternate options until such time as one of those options are adopted by a majority, then any outspoken opposition to that dominant society must be silenced, lest it create discontent among the masses.

Dominant societies grow comfortable, and in doing so, are much more willing to overlook those in the world who do not have the means to survive. This is currently, and has always been the case with Homo sapiens. Ask any Neanderthal, (if one were still alive to ask), and they would most certainly agree. 

I think freedom of speech is one of the most compelling of topics because I am so continuously divided between my belief in the freedom, and my fear of those who speak in dialogues that directly threaten me and everyone I love and care for. 

We are most certainly bringing this issue to a boiling point (again) in this country as we struggle to maintain a truly representational government of the people, by the people and for the people.

As more and more distraction layers are spun out of those who wish for all of this to subside so that they may continue to dominate their positions in the current world order, we would all be wise to watch what is allowed to be spoken, read or shared and that which is banned, and try our very best to understand who is banning a topic or person or book, and why they are motivated to do so.

Happy Monday

Wise people are not always silent, but they know when to be.

When is it best to speak up?

The subtlety of knowing what to say, when to say it and most importantly, when not to say it, could not be more important in life. We might study the art of diplomacy with an expectation of improving our knowledge of such, but much of this is learned empirically, either through our own actions or in watching those of others.

Sadly, the art of learning empirically comes with a tough downside. There are moments where we speak our mind as if it were the most important thing in the world, and then we discover that it was the most ill-timed opportunity as we watch whatever strategic move we felt we were employing, disintegrate right before our very eyes. 

The tragedy of these moments is that with greater knowledge, we might have been better served to have learned the art of silence instead. The adage, “It is better to keep your mouth closed and thought a fool, than open your mouth and confirm it,” could not be any more applicable.

In the course of running The Illusion Factory, I have been exposed to countless businesses, methodologies, approaches, strategies and tactics, most of which I knew very little about going into the discussions with the clients. I would say my clients have taught me every bit as much as I have taught them, if for no better reason than I have mastered the art of asking the right questions and not answering the wrong questions with a weak answer, or lying and pretending to know something I do not know. People are very quick to help you if you admit ignorance at the outset.

In personal relationships, the same principle applies. Regardless of which kind of personal relationship you are in, there are times you speak your mind, and other times when holding your tongue and allowing a circumstance to be is (by far) the best option. 

As I was discussing earlier in the week, sometimes silence is your greatest ally. Sometimes it can be thunderous in the silence it communicates to the other party. In that silence, the other party must consider all of the possible reasons for your silence, which may set their mind ablaze with considerations. This can be both a great strategy when timed appropriately, as well as a wise move, when you are trying your best to field the circumstances you have found yourself within, and are still contemplating your best options for resolution.

The short-lived enjoyment of blurting out what is really on your mind, is most often times rewarded with less than what you had hoped for in your calculated thoughts. After enough of these luxuries in allowing your internal being to communicate bluntly with others have exploded in your face, only then does your rational mind take control of the tongue and put everything in check long enough to really consider your options, even if your very best option is doing and saying nothing.

Happy Friday!

You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star.

FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE

How does something of magnitude get created?

Is it a fleeting thought that manifests?

Perhaps.

When we go into theta waves in our brain, it all starts to congeal. Theta activity has a frequency of 3.5 to 7.5 Hz and is classed as “slow” activity. It is seen in connection with creativity, intuition, daydreaming, and fantasizing and is a repository for memories, emotions, sensations. Theta waves are strong during internal focus, meditation, prayer, and spiritual awareness.

The likelihood of something of magnitude formulating while in theta waves is highly probable, and most likely to gestate into something larger. Some refer to this as plugging into Source.

It happens to all of us. You might be in the shower, or driving or taking a walk and when your mind quiets, and that very first glimmer of an idea strikes. I find that they come at me all the time, even if I am on camera in a Zoom meeting, I still write it down, because I know it will disappear as quickly as it arose.

To Nietzsche’s point, you do need that proverbial fire in the belly to make content of magnitude awaken within. If you are wholly content, and your ambition is at a flat line, those ideas will most likely appear with ever decreasing frequency. Whereas if you are continuously feeling as if you cannot manifest the things in your world to keep track with your rabid imagination, then I have noticed that the ideas come with ever increasing frequency. Almost to the point that there are so many, across such a wide field of topics and perspectives and corners of the imagination, as to make my head spin.

For me, the great joy are the notes I have taken. In those, I am reminded of so many of those immediate flashes of light as to give me roadmaps to where I might travel next. Many of them would have been long since forgotten had I not written them down upon discovering them.

In studying the luminous figures whose shoulders I hope to stand upon in order that I may view a perspective far beyond my own making, I see Beethoven, Edison, Mozart, da Vinci and countless others speaking of the same. In reading through da Vinci’s notebooks, I saw his mind was as scattered as my own. He could be doing calculations on the energy expended on a mechanical wing trying to create flight, and on the same page, he will sketch a segment of human anatomy, a leaf and a swirl of water next to curly hair, to make the connections.

Once you understand how you tap into Source (this magical space in theta waves) it is incredibly addictive. I would say that I would wish to spend my entire life in this space of immense creativity except I do not think anyone could operate there all the time. The magnitude of the frequency can be overwhelming and the mind needs time to quiet, formulate and contemplate all the dancing stars that have been manifested by the chaos within our souls.

Happy Monday!

You are the universe, expressing itself as a human for a little while.

ECKHART TOLLE

Antoine Lavoisier created the Law of Conservation of Mass in 1789 in which he stated, “Matter can change form through physical and chemical changes, but through any of these changes, matter is conserved. The same amount of matter exists before and after the change—none is created or destroyed.” In other words, the mass of any one element at the beginning of a reaction will equal the mass of that element at the end of the reaction. 

If that is the case, then the amount of matter that existed in the universe after the outcome of the Big Bang, is finite, and everything that has existed thereafter was created from the same set of matter.

When you look at this thought from a scientific perspective, you are able to more fully grasp that what Eckhart is saying must be true. When Carl Sagan said that “we’re made of star stuff,” he wasn’t being metaphoric. He was simply noting—in his uniquely precise and poetic way—that the raw materials that constitute our physical bodies were forged in the bellies of distant, long-extinguished stars.

As humans, we feel this intense sense of self importance. As a result, we are quick to point out the human soul and all of the possible variables surrounding it. I cannot speak to that part of the equation. Does a soul have mass? Is it energy? Is it even definable?

But to the physical form, we are created in the womb and from the moment the cell splits into two, we are growing. That growth comes from the nutrients in the mother’s body and each and every split of those cells delivers more mass. The nutrients come from mass consumed by the mother, and is converted to help grow the zygote into an embryo into a fetus and finally into a baby.

I like this quotation because it is both metaphoric as well as accurate. It places us properly in the larger scheme of the universe, and allows us to ponder where each of the atoms that comprise us have actually traveled and reconfigured over the 13.7 billion years since the Big Bang. 

If you take a moment and contemplate that parts of us were actually parts of millions of other things over time, you might consider what wisdom is potentially encapsulated in their essence, and then wonder is it even possible that we might tap into that stored wisdom, should that potentially exist.

Happy Tuesday!

My wish for you is that you continue. Continue to be who and how you are, to astonish a mean world with your acts of kindness. Continue to allow humor to lighten the burden of your tender heart.

MAYA ANGELOU

Sometimes the single best thing we are able to do is to just carry on. Stand tall and proud, head high, shoulders back and face the world with your single greatest strength…. Your persistence.

If it feels as if the world is slowly becoming more repressive and aggressive, that is because it genuinely is. If you can sense that change is coming, that is also because it has already left the station and is barreling down the tracks, headed straight for us.

Yet, that is the most interesting thing about life. As quickly as it may escalate in a specific direction, there are counterforces which are balancing points to hold most of it in check. If a pendulum swings aggressively in one direction, we may almost always count on the physics that will eventually pull it back in the opposite direction.

Great societies rise, dominate, suffocate in their own ignorance, giving way to new societies with new agendas. It has always been this way for Homo sapiens and it does not appear to be relenting soon. 

Periodically we encounter a new faction of a populous who are determined to impose their will upon other, less capable people. In this proverbial swing of a pendulum, those who are imposing their will, do so with a self-righteous vigor that unquestionably makes the oppressed party find cause to organize and revolt against the status quo.

I do not believe there is a solution to this. I wish there were. As a child, I listened to my mother hope for a world in which everything was compassionate, understanding, tender and sincere. I would listen to her hopes and yet, it was always very clear to me that it was an utopian dream that was not representative of what Homo sapiens are capable of achieving at this stage of our evolution. Regardless of how much she hoped it would be like that, my experiences continued to prove out how very unlikely those odds were.

In contrast, my father was far less utopian in his perspective, but his take on things was to be extra kind to everyone he met, to greet them with a warm smile and a genuine desire to be appreciative of their presence. He would tease in a friendly way with people that would quickly win them over and cause them to sense his genuine warmth and kindness. That was never lost on me.

When the larger picture feels so overwhelming at times, I believe the only refuge we may have is to go deep within and manifest a genuine part of our internal being that wants to communicate with others in a way that enables them to sense our true qualities and to enable them to drop defenses and communicate back to us with equal warmth and appreciation.

In the end, isn’t that one of life’s greatest treasures?

Happy Saturday!

They don’t lie to you because the truth will hurt your feelings. They lie to you because the truth might provoke you to make choices that won’t serve their interests.

A lie is an interesting construct. 

It starts with the proposition that the recipient is able to be deceived. 

The magician lies to you as they make an illusion happen right before your very eyes. They tell you something is going to happen and when it does, you are sold on the miracle of something that would be impossible. In that illusion comes the opportunity to plant a seed of a false truth in the mind of others, so as to convey the impossible. We are all willing participants in such an illusion and when watching a magician perform, we opt to suspend our belief in order to appreciate the excellence within which the magician performs. I personally have never explored magician’s secrets. I love the fact that when they are performing, I am able to be reduced to such wonder as to enjoy the incredible artistry with which they create the impossible… right before my very eyes.

Most lies are less benevolent than the magician. In most cases, a lie is formulated in the mind of someone who has an agenda. That agenda could be a plan to serve needs on the part of the person telling the lie, or to serve an agenda for those whom the liar is lying on behalf of. In either case, it is clearly an agenda, otherwise, who would waste time telling an unnecessary untruth?

The agendas vary from personal to professional to societal. Regardless of whom the lie is serving, its construct starts with the premise that in saying such things, another person or people will have an expected reaction to this lie. Those reactions are calculated by the liar to assist them in whatever is giving them cause to construct such a fallacy. In that calculation comes a wager that if they violate the truth in the course of the discussion, they will avoid whatever repercussion said truth would have brought upon them. 

Lies are more often than not taught by an older sibling at a very early age. In that moment, a younger child learns that their sibling avoided punishment by saying something to the parent that was not accurate. In watching this example, and seeing their sibling get away with whatever they did wrong, a formulation is created that lasts a lifetime. This is not regulated to a sibling, as it can be learned from a parent, a friend, a relative or from any form of media, be it a book, tv show, video, movie or other.

As we grow older, we witness countless lies, and eventually in a moment of need, we find ourselves resorting to using them ourselves. They may be very small lies, to avoid having to attend an event, or they may be white lies which are most often told to avoid hurting the feelings of another. They may take the form of self deception, in order to lie to ourselves about a truth we do not wish to face. Or they may be heinous in their origin and have a deeper reason that is designed to create an outcome of darker origin.

In the larger landscape of society, lies are told by the minute. They are proliferating at such a rapid rate with the advent of social media and YouTube, TikTok, and others as to leave us living in a world of massive untruths which serve countless agendas, far too disparate to delineate here. 

The deepest truth about a lie is that it is a tool. It is designed to hurt recipients and maintain a control that enables the originators of the lie to continue to act in their own self interests, while dominating others who are less fortunate to understand what is being perpetrated upon them. 

If you are educated, and willing to dig deeper than what you are exposed to at face value, you will uncover so many lies as to make your head spin. You see them all over the news and watch as forces which hope to dominate society, battle for our very freedom.

Lies will enslave you, if you are not fully awake. They will destroy you if you are not cognizant of their potential existence. Keeping a strong vigil internally against them by always asking yourself, “what is the cause for this person or entity to be proclaiming whatever it is that they are proclaiming?” is your first best line of defense. If you are not always watching for who is lying and anticipating why they would lie to you, you are walking (most likely) directly into a trap that can be your ultimate demise.

Happy Tuesday!

The older I get, the more I would rather sit alone, than with people who judge the way I live.

There are so many aspects to maintaining balance in the course of a daily life. If we are to distill them down into individual components, the requirements are exhaustive.

Beyond the survival variables, we each make so many individual choices in terms of family, interests, wardrobe, friends, employment, entertainment, studies, hobbies, reading materials, service, religion, and use of our free time… to name only but a few.

As we mature, we are subject to numerous third parties who presume to judge us by our combined set of variables, whether chosen or inherited. There is no escaping this aspect of human behavior. It is a natural occurrence and it can bring both positive and negative experiences into our lives.

Walking the fine line between allowing some of this judgment to become wind under our wings while simultaneously protecting ourselves from unnecessary harsh judgment that is undeserved can be a delicate balancing act at best.

The more self-confident we become, the more capable we are of discerning the difference between the two. With maturity, we discover the benefit of learning how to filter out all of the negativity that can stem from the harsh perspective of others. Their jealousy, or insecurity or envy can manifest in some of the most uncomfortable experiences that we might encounter in our day-to-day existence. The choices they might make in their communication of such can disrupt harmony and balance in our lives and replace those with a wave of negativity that we, in many cases, are unable to avoid. Perhaps the only solution is to become so self-confident that we are more adept at filtering those kinds of people and circumstances from our daily existence, wherever possible.

When we discover that sometimes we are our own best company, we become deeply empowered to discard the company of those who might otherwise rob us of our harmony or wa, as it’s called in the  Japanese culture. These qualities are some of the most sought after values in life. So the awareness that is required to generate a rearguard which protects us from such disruption, could not be more necessary.

Our journey as individuals is crucial to the development of a life worth living. This lesson is not always easily learned, often requiring numerous encounters with those who pound this lesson into us through negativity and uncomfortable attacks on aspects of our being.

When you emerge from such an attack, I believe it is most wise to take a calm stance and see those attacks as beneficial. I call them my “Zen masters,” because each and every one of these attacks are experiences that work diligently to destroy my balance, and cause me to fall, fail or be miserable. By categorizing them as a Zen master, I reconfigure their place in my world as regular tests of my increasing ability to discard them like water off a duck’s back. This task is neither pleasant, nor easy…. But learning and mastering such a system can significantly reduce a life full of unwarranted negative stimuli that only impedes our true potential from emerging.

The choice is yours.

Happy Monday!