Never regret being a good person to the wrong people. Your behavior says everything about you, and their behavior says enough about them.

Never regret being a good person to the wrong people. Your behavior says everything about you, and their behavior says enough about them.

Have you ever walked away feeling like “no kind deed goes unpunished?”

It is that feeling that results from having gone out of your way to do something warm and kind for someone who not only does not appreciate what you have done, but is actually feeling negative about your having done so.

The reality is that we do kind things for others, but in actuality, we are equally being kind to ourselves. There are lots of nomenclature to describe what this means. Some call it charity or benevolence. Others call it compassion or mercy. While others refer to it as humane or soulful. Regardless of your terminology, I would say that it starts with self awareness. If we are self aware, we are conscious of far more than just that which is within our own boundaries, regardless of how counterintuitive that may appear. 

In that state of heightened awareness, we not only search deep within, but we are equally aware of that which is outside of us. How else would we know where our essence stops, and the rest of the world starts? While searching deep within, we find a need or desire to bring a part of what we treasure about our own being to others. This is where kindness starts. As we sense that we are holding something of value, we wish to share that with another being. We want to deliver to them a portion of that which is so clearly valuable to ourselves. Drill down on any act of kindness that is motivated for pure reasons and you will discover that this is truly the root of the behavior. It is also the root of humor. If we know something is funny, why do we share it? We do so because we are the bearers of delight. It enlightens our being to say or do or share something kind, warm or funny because it enables us to deliver something of immense intangible value to another person or being.

There are circumstances in which these choices are motivated out of an ulterior motive. Depending on the motive, the degree of personal kindness may be blurred by cause, need or desire to gain influence or favor from the recipient. 

In contrast, others may not be as readily able to receive these gifts as we are to deliver them. Their frame of mind may be clouded by a host of emotions, physical pain or emotional pain, which preclude them from being the desirable recipients we wish that they were. They may not deliver the reaction we had hoped for, because they may not be capable of it at that moment. This does not mean that deep within that they are devoid of any appreciation of the kindness that has been shared.

Kindness is a vibration. When you drill down on the world using an electron microscope, you learn that every last thing is a vibration. The electrons are all vibrational waves of energy. So we and everything around us are just vibrational energy. If you see your kindness as a vibration, it is no difference than watching a rock drop into a pool of water that creates ripples to travel across the surface. When you bestow kindness, be it a gentle caress, a smile, a warm expression, a joke, an act of service, a gift or other, you are putting your proverbial stone into the water of their being. Your kindness ripples through them in visible ways, delivering expressions of gratitude that display the results of your actions.  

If your kindness is not reciprocated by the results you had hoped for, you must find your internal reward in knowing that you delivered what you had to deliver and whether they express their appreciation now, in the future, or never, it was truly an act of being kind to yourself. In your choice to be the person that is capable of delivering such value to another, your own personal wealth increases exponentially. And in the end, isn’t that truly what our ultimate opportunity in life is? The chance to grow, learn, evolve, mature and appreciate all of the chapters along the way?

Happy Saturday!

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Written by Brian Weiner
When I was 5 years old, I discovered that the lemon tree in the backyard + dixie cups + water and sugar and I was in business. I have been hooked on that ever since. In 1979, I borrowed $14,000 to create a brand new product... photographic greeting cards with no text on the inside, called Paradise Photography. That was the start of The Illusion Factory. Since then, The Illusion Factory has been entrusted by all of the major studios and broadcasters with the advertising and marketing of over $7 billion in filmed, live, broadcast, gaming, AR, VR and regulated gaming forms of entertainment, generating more than $100 Billion in revenue and 265 awards for creativity and technology for our clients. When I took a break from film school at UCLA to move to Hawaii, my mother did not lecture me. Instead, she took 150 of her favorite aphorisms and in her beautiful calligraphy, wrote them artistically throughout a blank journal. That is the origin of the Lessons from the Mountain series. Since then, on my journeys to the top of a mountain to watch the sunrise, I have spent countless hours contemplating words of wisdom from the sages of all races, genders and political persuasions, constantly accumulating the thoughts to guide me on my life path. I hope you enjoy my books. Please let me know your thoughts, as I highly value your feedback!